Hey, this is Lindsay Dotzlaf and you are listening to Mastering Coaching Skills episode 297.

To really compete in the coaching industry, you have to be great at coaching. That’s why every week, I will be answering your questions, sharing my stories, and offering tips and advice so you can be the best at what you do. Let’s get to work.

Hey coach. So first, if you are a regular listener, if you listened to last week’s episode, I promised you a part two and don’t worry, that is coming. It will happen next week, episode 298. For today, I had to pop in with something super, really important because I had an experience today that I need you to have with me in real time. All right? So, this is going to be a short episode that will hopefully shift something for you about your coaching practice.

And upfront, I just want to say, share this with friends, give it to people who need to hear it, and there is a downloadable version of the questions I’m about to ask you in the show notes. You’ll understand why I’m saying this in a second. But if you don’t want to listen to this 100 times and pause and answer, pause and answer, I will put all the questions in a link in the show notes, so go there to grab it if you want it after you listen. But for now, just give it a listen, see if anything pops up as I’m talking and take that with you into doing this exercise for yourself for yourself. Okay?

So, a tiny bit of context. Today, I went to the first call of a group coaching call that I’m participating in. And before the first call, there was homework given. There were audios to listen to, and then a values exercise to take notes on and answer and write down and all the things. And I didn’t actually do the homework. So I went to the call, and I promised myself before I went to this call that I was showing up. So it’s only, I believe, six calls, and I promised myself I’m showing up fully, 100%. I’m doing all the work, ironic, considering I didn’t do the homework. And I’m just going to show up super vulnerably and just be myself and participate when I’m asked to participate and not hold back at all.

So, of course, the universe was like, “Prove it.” because today, what happened was we were asked to read aloud our vision statement of our business, which in the homework, there were a bunch of prompts given to create our statement. Now, I also want to be very clear, this is the School of Consent-Based Business with Tarzan K. She’s amazing. And because so much consent given, we were fully allowed to pass or not participate. But remember, I had committed to showing up in a way that maybe sometimes I don’t.

And so, what happens is, she says, “I’m going to read mine” and she does. And then she says, “I’m just going to go in order, and you can read yours.” And guess who was the first person to be called on? Me. So fun. And she gave options, right? She’s like, “If you haven’t done your homework, it’s okay. You can ad-lib. You can pass. Feel totally free to pass, or you can just read what you have or parts of what you have.”

And every ounce of my body wanted me to pass, right? It was like, “Don’t do it. You haven’t done the homework. You’re not going to know.” And I didn’t have any time to prepare. They put the prompts in the chat. And I decided in that moment, I was going to take a deep breath, lean in, and just say what felt true to me then. And I just need you to know, as I was saying the answers, they felt so clunky. But they also felt more true than anything that I would have prepared. Right? There were things that just came out of me that even as I was saying them, there was a little thought that was like, “Wait, where’s this coming from?”

Now, you better believe I’m going to find this recording if she posts it or ask her for it and see my answers or listen to what I actually said because afterwards, I think I blacked out for a second, I don’t remember. But I just know that there was so much truth said in that moment. When I didn’t curate it, when I didn’t even have a moment to prepare, when I just set my nerves aside and got really honest in that moment.

Now, the other piece of context is over the last week, I’ve been doing calls with coaches that want to join the Reimagine Mastermind. And I’m doing this by invite only. If you want an invite, let me know if what I’m about to say resonates. Let me know, but that’s not what this episode is about, okay?

One thing that I have noticed in doing these calls with some coaches I know, most of them are coaches I know that I’ve worked with that are in my world. I haven’t actually opened it up widely yet as I’m recording this. One thing I notice is that so many of them are saying, “I feel a little lost.” Maybe things are really working in their business, maybe they’re not, but kind of a common thread is, “I feel a little lost, and I can’t kind of continue in the way that I’ve been building my business.”

And I get it. That is the work I’ve been doing for the last three years or so. And over probably the last year specifically, that work has gotten a lot louder for me and a lot stronger. And it’s been really powerful. And I very much resonate with all of the things that they are saying on these calls. And these are not their words, but if I paraphrase kind of what they say is, “I had my head down. I was work, work, work, work, work, achieve, achieve, achieve, success, success, do all the things. And then one day I kind of looked up and thought, ‘Wait, where am I? I don’t recognize myself. I don’t recognize my business. Even if it’s working, I don’t know if this is something I want, but I’m also scared to admit it’s not working because it is. It’s just not working for me.'”

This is why this episode feels very important. And this is not about fixing anything. This is not about fixing you. This is about getting you closer to your path, finding that thread again, or discovering it for the first time if you’re new here or if you’re a new coach.

Okay? So what’s about to happen is I’m going to give you some prompts, and I just want you to take a second and answer them. The only direction I want to give you is answer with whatever comes for you, just as I did in the moment where I had to ad-lib and I had to just fill in the gaps. Now, I do want to be very clear, these are not the prompts. I didn’t just copy her prompts and bring them here. That would be silly. I would never do that. These are prompts that I created specifically for you, but they have the same spirit as what I experienced today.

Okay? So I’m going to read these slowly. Notice if there are answers as I read that just pop up. And if you’re not driving or showering and you want to pause as I read each one, go for it. Or if there’s one where a strong answer just comes out of nowhere, maybe pause there and take a note. But otherwise, remember, we are putting a link in the show notes. You can always come back to it, access it, and have all of the prompts to write your answers. Okay? And if any of them don’t resonate at all, just skip them.

So here we go. These first prompts are about who you are. I am someone who… What makes me feel most alive is… I love… What I know to be possible that others might doubt is… Something I’ve learned to be true about myself is… And at the end of a long day, what brings me back to myself is…

These next prompts are about other people in the world. The people I most want to sit across from are… Something I’ve always known to be true about humans is… I believe people are capable of… The world I want to live in is…

And these next prompts are about why you do the work you do. I became a coach because… When my work is at its best, the people I work with walk away feeling… Or, if you’re a brand new coach: In the future, the clients I serve will walk away feeling… At the end of each day, I want to know that I…

And then after responding to these, I want you to think about your commitments to yourself moving forward. So here are a couple of prompts for that. Moving forward, I commit to… When I feel lost, I will remind myself…

And then one very last prompt to wrap it all together. The thing I want to be known for that has nothing to do with revenue or followers is…

So, that’s it. That’s the whole episode. I want you to sit with these prompts. Even if there was just one prompt that struck you, that hit some kind of nerve, sit with it. Hear your answers. If some of them felt super clunky, that’s okay. That means something real is coming out of you.

So again, I will put all of these in the show notes. And if something I said today in this very short episode really resonates with you, and you want to form a different relationship with your business, just know if you’re listening in real time, I am currently enrolling for the Reimagine Mastermind. I have about five spots left as I’m recording this. If one of them is for you, let me know. I will be back next week with part two of what I started last week. I’ll see you then.

Thanks for listening to this episode of Mastering Coaching Skills. If you want to learn more about my work, come visit me at lindsaydotzlafcoaching.com. That’s Lindsay with an A, D-O-T-Z-L-A-F.com. See you next week.