Hey, this is Lindsay Dotzlaf and you are listening to Mastering Coaching Skills episode 216.

To really compete in the coaching industry, you have to be great at coaching. That’s why every week, I will be answering your questions, sharing my stories, and offering tips and advice so you can be the best at what you do. Let’s get to work.

Hey coach, I have such a fun interview for you planned today. One thing that I have coming up that I will be hosting that is already selling right now, so if you’re interested definitely come check it out, we’ll put the link in the show notes.

But one of my favorite things to do is work with clients on projects. I do it in my advanced certification and I now also have a project offer where over three months you bring a project and you complete it in those three months in a group.

And it is, first of all, so fun, but also just really some of my favorite work to do because it’s always pretty specific, everybody is working on a specific thing, but it just brings up so much. So much goodness that really helps coaches move, take giant leaps forward in their practices and their businesses.

And the person I’m interviewing today, Temetria, is actually in my advanced certification, but what we’re talking about specifically on this podcast is the project that she did in the certification because it was so fun to coach her, so fun to walk her through all the piece of it, and just to really watch her develop self-trust in her coaching and in the incredible work that she does.

I think you’re going to learn so much from this on a personal level, on a coaching level, you’re going to have lots of takeaways. So, with no further ado, here is my interview with Temetria McVea on curating your life and your coaching process.

Lindsay: Hello, I am so happy to have you here today. Tell everyone who you are and what you do.

Temetria: Hi, thank you so much for having me here. I’m Temetria McVea and I am a life coach for women in lid-life.

Lindsay: So like me?

Temetria: Yes.

Lindsay: Perfect. Do you have a definition for that? When you say mid-life is just like whatever someone kind of translates that to or do you have a specific definition?

Temetria: I googled what mid-life meant, what the range was, and it’s a very broad range. Early mid-life starts at 35 to 40.

Lindsay: Okay.

Temetria: And late mid-life is 60 to 65. So that is a wide range of people.

Lindsay: A wide range, yes.

Temetria: It’s a big range. So what I have been thinking about is women in transition, because we go through a lot of transitions during those time periods.

Lindsay: Yeah, I think that that’s so true. And I think I actually heard someone talking about mid-life recently, and I don’t even remember what podcast it was but it was two people having a conversation around it and I just related to so much of what they were saying although they defined it as a little older. I’m 43, I’ll be 44 this year, and they were around 50, something like that.

But I think just especially if you have kids or if you don’t have kids or whatever, there’s just something that starts to happen around 40. Like if your kids are getting older there are lots of changes that happen, and then all the body stuff that’s happening and all the like where do I fit in society happening. Just all kinds of stuff all at once.

Temetria: Yes. And it depends, you’re right, on what your life circumstance is, like when your kids are leaving the house. Mine, I don’t have children, so mine was looking at being in a career for 20 some odd years and thinking, is this it? And I think that question comes up for a lot of people, no matter your life situation. Is this it? Or what else is there? So those are the questions that I help clients answer.

Lindsay: Yeah, when I heard them talking about this, I actually kind of just mentally, I didn’t take notes or anything, but mentally kind of divided my life into my work and just me. Like the things that are just kind of me. And then my kids, because I feel like they do determine a lot of what my schedule is and what my, you know, like that stuff shifts.

I’ve been very surprised having teenagers, how much work it is, I guess. Like just all the driving and all the things. All the places they need to be. And I didn’t see that coming and for me that has been a real adjustment because I like to do what I like to do.

But then also looking at it as far as my business and my whatever, so I can see, yeah, definitely if I was in more of a corporate space, I’m sure that would be coming up. Like am I just staying here? Is this the job that I’m having forever? Are there moves? So maybe that’s a transition into how did you get here? How did you get into coaching? Does it have anything to do with this? Like, is there an overlap?

Temetria: There is an overlap that didn’t have anything to do with – Well, there is an overlap. I got into coaching because I got coaching. I found a weight loss coach. And I lost weight physically, but I lost a lot of mental weight and I started to see the possibilities and all of the questions and all of the deep exploring that we do.

I started to question things and question what I really wanted and the “is this it” question started to come up. And what did I really want? And if I could have anything that I wanted, what did I want to create? What did I want to try? What did I want to explore? So one of those was coaching. I wanted to try coaching. I was the executive assistant to the president of an insurance company for 23 years.

Lindsay: Okay.

Temetria: That’s a long time.

Lindsay: Yep. You were settled there, for sure. That was quite a while.

Temetria: Yes. Great company, great people, and I was ready for something different.

Lindsay: Yeah. That’s a fun place to make a change from though. I mean, instead of the alternative, which is like I hate everything about this and how do I just get out, versus love the company, love the people, and I personally am just ready for change.

Do you think that made it easier for you to navigate it or harder because there wasn’t anything necessarily wrong with the circumstances? Or maybe there were, I guess I don’t know.

Temetria: Well, I think it was a little bit harder because a new president had just come in. And she was a wonderful woman, the first woman president of that company, somebody that I’d worked with my whole time there. And I really wanted to be there and I really wanted to support her and see all of the things that she was going to do because I knew she was doing great things.

And also I promised myself – I went through three presidents and I said that was my last one. I knew I wanted to do something different, even if it was in the company. And so that was tough. Like I felt like I was walking away from her. I was not. She totally understood and was so supportive and so wonderful. So that was one of the things that made it tough. But I was excited about creating this business and doing this.

Lindsay: And then so what was that transition like? So you decided you were going to be a coach and then what?

Temetria: And then happily ever after.

Lindsay: And then the next day – This is like most coaches’ dreams. They’re going to be like, what, you just did it?

Temetria: No, I decided I was going to be a coach. I set a date to give my notice and I think I gave myself like four months to really think about it. But I had that date circled on my calendar, so I started planning and, you know, the things that I do. And it was still like questions would come up.

And even after I gave my notice, I gave them a month, a little over a month to find the replacement.

That question would come up like, oh, am I doing the right thing? And then when I left, I was like, okay, I’ve done it. Doubt sometimes still creeps in, but that’s life, I think. And you just, you work through them and you remember your reasons why and you keep going.

Lindsay: Yeah. What was the thing you were kind of following to get through that? Like that you would remind yourself or that you would, you know, like on the days that you questioned it or it felt hard, what did you kind of lean into to get yourself through it?

Temetria: Well, my vision really for my life, and that’s my curate your life process that I used.

Lindsay: Which is why you’re here. We’re going to talk all about it, I cannot wait for them to hear.

Temetria: So I used that for another transition, but that was one of the things I did. I really figured out what I wanted my life to look like, what I wanted it to look like when I was sitting in my office, how I wanted to feel. And I would go back to that vision and why I wanted to create that.

And one of the reasons is my mom is older. My dad was still alive at the time and he’s since passed, but time, like time to really spend with them and to be with them. And I could have taken a lot of time, probably taken the time that I needed, but it’s a little bit different freedom now. I can take my mom somewhere and work and we can also play and it’s just different.

Lindsay: Yeah, I can see how that would be a really good drive, for sure. I always think about that when I’m sitting in my office and my house is quiet, no one’s home and I’m just like, this is so great. And have the flexibility to, I just took my mom to a doctor’s appointment recently, and I’m like, man, it would be really hard to go back to an office. Do you ever think about that?

Temetria: I do. I do, yeah because I mean, full transparency, I’m still building and there are times that I’m like, ooh, did I make the right decision? And I still think yes.

Lindsay: I don’t know if that goes away completely, by the way. Just so you know, for everybody listening, that’s like, oh yeah, that’s hard or whatever. There are days that I’m like, what if I didn’t have to run this whole thing? Like, what if I could just go work somewhere, they just told me what to do and that was all I had to do was show up and do the thing. Of course, I’m sure I wouldn’t love it once I got there. But that’s like, sometimes it’s like the grass is always greener.

Temetria: Yeah.

Lindsay: Okay, so you were in my advanced certification, which is how I – You’re also in The Coach Lab, so I kind of knew you from there. And then you joined the advanced certification, I think after, right? You were already in The Coach Lab before? Yeah. And I loved working with you. And one of the things that we do in there is everybody does a project.

And I loved your project so much, which is partially why you’re here because I said you have to come on, we have to talk about this. And it has so much to do with what you were just talking about. So do you want to just tell them – I could try to describe it, but you’re going to do it way better. What was the kind of project that you decided on?

Temetria: So I decided on really putting some structure and answering some questions around my Curate Your Life program at the name and the concept. But the process that you gave us and the questions and the time to really spend on it and really figure out, is this the way I want it to work and bring the questions to coaching and say, this is what I’m thinking, does this sound right?

So I really put structure around the program. It’s a 13-week program. I work one-on-one with my clients. But I wanted to have something to really help them build that vision. So the program is really building the vision, creating the vision and then starting to curate, like a museum. Like, does this fit that picture? If it does, you do more of it or you add to it. If it doesn’t, you take it away.

And it really is kind of a step-by-step process to building out that picture of your dream life. Or if it’s just a smaller goal than a big dream life, like building the steps and taking the steps to get to that goal.

Lindsay: Yeah. One thing I remember from you – So many things I remember, actually, that stand out to me. But one thing that really kind of makes me, not laugh at you, but laugh just at the process of it is I just remember you kind of coming back with like – Like you’re a really good student, right?

And I think I told you that kind of towards the beginning, like, listen, you did the thing already, like it’s done. And you kept wanting me to say like, yes, this is great. And I kept saying, I think you just have to go test it, that’s how you’re going to know.

And I’m just curious, because I know now you’ve taken some clients through it. Do all your clients kind of go through that process in some form?

Temetria: In some form, yes. And I really did, I wanted a check mark, right? I wanted something. But I realized, and you helped me realize this, that it needs to be fluid because every person that I coach is going to bring something else or going to be in a different place. And so I have the structure that I can bring, and also I have the space for them to bring whatever they need and we can just coach through.

So it does not have to be call one is this, call two is that. There’s the beginning structure to kind of set things up, and then it’s just coaching, right? And I say just coaching, but that is the –

Lindsay: Which is really like the meat of all of it, right? I love hearing that because I find this to be true with most coaches that really, like their brain really just craves some structure and some like, I just want to know what’s going to happen on each session and I want it to be a little more methodical.

And I always say, great, do it. Don’t fight against yourself if that’s what you, you know, maybe if you’ve heard other coaches say like, oh, my clients just come and we coach on whatever. If that just throws you into like, how? Like I need more structure. Great, create the structure, which is what I watched you do.

And then what you just said, I think that you’ve told me since, or maybe it was even happening at the end of the certification where you said, okay, so I get it now. I love that I have this process. And sometimes we veer quite a ways off of the process and then come back.

Temetria: Yes, yes. Well, and I will say two things. One, that was leftover corporate world stuff, right? Just being an executive assistant, there was a lot of structure, a lot of rules.

Lindsay: Oh, I’m sure you were, yeah, like to be amazing at the job that you had and to work for all the different people and be good at it, you, I’m sure, are excellent at structure and processes and all of those things.

Temetria: Right. But the other thing you helped me with, like I had to trust myself and the process. And so that was, I think that was probably really my big work, is self-trust. That I have this program, I know what it is. And I have the coaching tools. And I can just be with that person and figure out what they need and help them get there. And if I need to set the Curate Your Life program aside a little bit, that’s okay, because we can always come back to it. I look at it now as another one of the tools that I have.

Lindsay: Yes. Yeah. And you have – I work with so many coaches like this, you have so many tools. You’re so genius. I saw that in you immediately when you and I were talking, especially in Miami, I just loved the in person event for the certification. I loved chatting with you and getting to know you. And yeah, I love working with coaches like you who are like, I have all of the things.

And what I know, even though I can’t obviously just say this because it’s not that easy, is like, oh, yeah, it always comes back to self-trust and trusting that you can handle whatever someone brings. It’s not the actual process that’s getting them the results. It’s the coaching and you showing up and allowing them to just figure it out.

Temetria: Correct.

Lindsay: Yeah. Okay, so is there anything else, since we haven’t talked that much about it since then, is there anything else that’s come up since you’ve been working, like taking people through it? Anything else that you have learned about it?

Temetria: I have learned that it really is, and I knew this, but really it’s general life coaching, which I’m okay with. It’s general life coaching and I gave it a fun name. A name that I love.

Lindsay: I love that, though. It is general and kind of specific. I think that so much coaching can be that way. And people love to overcomplicate it. But really, it’s like you have an idea of here’s the work, the type of work I love to do with my clients. I want to help them curate their life, curate one part of their life, start to think about curating their life, like some form of that.

But really, when you have something like that, it’s like you can take any theme and plug it into that. So it could be their job, where they live, whatever. You can take anything and plug it into this formula that you’ve created.

Temetria: Yes. Yeah. Relationships, all of it.

Lindsay: Yes. Yeah. And it’s so clear to me that you are, you know, they say like a product of your product, right? Because you made some huge changes in your life.

Temetria: I did, yeah. So one of the ones, and this was after I started coaching and realized that I wanted to make some changes in my life. I lived out in the suburbs, lived the garage life. I would pull into my garage, go in. And then when I left, open the garage door, pull out and go and not necessarily see my neighbors, not have a lot of interactions. It was just really life in the suburbs. I was single, no kids.

And I decided that I wanted to move into town and be in a place where I can walk to restaurants and go to plays. I could go to plays anyway, but you know, just it’s more –

Lindsay: But to be like in it.

Temetria: More in it, yes. So that was the first change that I made. And I kind of had to get the picture of what I wanted. Like, I loved my house, I just didn’t want to be out in the suburbs. So now I have my house kind of in this apartment. And one of these days I’ll be downtown Austin in a higher high rise. And yeah, so I’m working my way there.

Lindsay: I love this example. And we kind of talked about this before we started recording because I’ve heard you talk about this in a, I think it was a workshop maybe that you did during the certification that I kind of watched and gave you some feedback on. And I was like, oh, this is such a good example that most people can probably relate to.

And I love the way you talked about it, where it wasn’t just like, okay, I realized I don’t want to live in the suburbs in this house, not interacting with my neighbors. And so I went all the way to like the dream and kind of like what you joked earlier, and then it was just happily ever after. Right? It was like you started incrementally thinking, okay, why do I want that? And how do I start to create that now? Can you give some of those examples?

Temetria: Yes. So again, my ultimate dream is downtown high-rise in Austin, maybe another city, but probably in Austin. Can’t afford that quite yet, so I am in like a condo style building.

Lindsay: Yeah, let’s just pause there. I think that’s so, like just seeing that, right? It’s like some people would be like, well, I could never afford that. And then just stop there, period. Okay, not thinking about it anymore.

Temetria: Right.

Lindsay: And instead you were like, okay, wait, well I can’t afford the ultimate thing. So what can I afford? Like, what is the thing? Okay, continue. Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt.

Temetria: So then the thing is an apartment on four floors. I’m on the top floor. I have a great view of the pool, it’s like a resort style pool. So I have a great view of that. And it has that kind of living, like not a doorman, but packages are in the package room and you have to buzz people in. So I’m getting closer to the thing that I want.

I know some of my neighbors, we have community events. The restaurants are getting better, they’re adding more and they’re all walkable. There’s a great park and I can go take walks and do different things. So it’s getting closer to that picture that I have in my head.

Lindsay: Yes. Yeah, I can just picture that, maybe because I just relate to this a little bit. I told you this earlier, but just that I always have said, even before we had kids, like I just want to live somewhere where I just don’t even need a car if I don’t have to have one. Like, I just want to be able to walk wherever I want to walk. And my husband is always kind of like, well, that’s like not – We probably have to move, maybe move states or, you know, not really sure.

But even just hearing you say that when I was watching your thing, it started poking holes in that story that I have that’s like, that’s just for later. Like that’s after the kids are out of school. And so, yeah, I think it’s just so powerful, simple but so powerful to say, okay, anything you have that’s like that, that’s like, oh, that’s for later, but how can you just start creating it now?

Temetria: Right. And that’s the Curate Your Life process, right? You paint the picture and then you start to take away the things that don’t fit that picture or do less of them or eliminate them. And then you start to bring in the things that will create that.

Lindsay: Yeah, so great.

Temetria: And it sounds simple, but then we have to get past the mind blocks.

Lindsay: Yeah. Right, as we talk about, it’s like, of course, you just sold your house and then moved to this thing. But I’m sure, like how long did that actual process take you from the time you made the decision or started thinking about it like, okay, maybe I could really make a change until you were where you are now?

Temetria: Probably four or five months. And a lot of it was thinking, what are people going to think if I sell my house? Because that’s the American dream, right? To have a house. And again, it was a great house. And I’m like, I didn’t want to – Well, I didn’t do the yard, I had a yard guy. But I didn’t want to do all those things, like think about all those things. And so when I got past that, actually getting an agent, I got a great agent and she took care of everything. I had an offer in less than a month. So from when I signed the contract to sell my house to having to be out, that was a couple of months.

Lindsay: Yeah, that’s so good. This is also clearly why I love you. We have a lot in common because I’m like, yeah, owning all the things. That’s so overrated. Like all the adulting sometimes is just too much.

Okay. And how’s it going? Are you loving it? Or are you thinking about like, what’s that next thing? Or is it like now we sit here for a minute and then let that take time?

Temetria: I do still love it, I am thinking about the next steps. Yes, I’m thinking about the next steps, but I do still love it. And I do have moments when I walk to the grocery store or I walk to the park and I’m like, this is it. This is what I wanted.

Lindsay: Okay, so let’s say you were working with a client on that. So we don’t have to get into your personal stuff, but you’re working on a client. They’re doing something similar, right? Where it’s like, okay, they’ve made it to kind of like that first big step, right? Because there’s all the planning and everything that happens before, but then the first big kind of change.

How do you guide them? Like, what’s the next thing? Is it like right away you start thinking about like, okay, what’s kind of the next phase of it? And then how long will that take and like planning for it?

Temetria: I think a couple of things. One, celebrate. Celebrate that you’re there, that you took that step and that it’s working. And then, yeah, think about what is the next step? Is it a big step that you need to plan for? And we’ll start to work through that process. Or is it a smaller step that we can do in the next few weeks?

And it kind of depends on what they’re working on, right? I had a client working on starting a design business, and so we did kind of all the administrative things and it was a lot of action.

Lindsay: Yeah, that initial setup of all the things.

Temetria: Which was easy, like she was taking those steps. And then we had to start talking about the marketing and getting yourself out there and really putting yourself out there, possibly being rejected or not having the clients flow in like you want it to.

Lindsay: I’m sure a lot of coaches are nodding right now. Like, yeah, I know this phase.

Temetria: Yeah, so that took, we spent more time on that. Like setting up the business was quick, that was fine. And then it was the mindset that we did a lot of work on.

Lindsay: And do you coach people – I think you said relationships maybe. Like is that a thing you coach on often? And do you use the same process?

Temetria: So I had to coach myself through that.

Lindsay: Awesome.

Temetria: I coached myself through that. And it is the same process, right? It’s the picture of what you want in a relationship and –

Lindsay: Is what I have now, like does it match that?

Temetria: Right.

Lindsay: Whatever that is.

Temetria: That was my case. I was dating a great guy, but he was not checking the boxes and we both knew it. Like we knew that we wanted different things. So then it was a matter of, okay, eliminating is a bad word in this case, but ending the relationship. And now I’m like, now I have to bring in somebody that fits that picture. So I’m working on that. So I’m actively looking.

Lindsay: I love it. Okay. So, it is kind of the same process as the house, right? It’s like seeing, okay, maybe this is great and it’s totally what some people want, and it’s not the vision of what I want.

Temetria: Yes, it was exactly that.

Lindsay: I love it. And nice that it was maybe mutual, so that probably made it a little easier.

Temetria: It was. It was one of the most adult conversations I’ve ever had in my life.

Lindsay: Yeah, I can see that. At least sometimes when it’s you making the decision about the house and the moving and all the things, it’s like just a conversation maybe with yourself and maybe people in your life, but mostly it was probably a you decision. With this it’s like, okay, is this what we want?

Temetria: Yeah.

Lindsay: When you work with your clients, is that often a factor? Or do you tend to work with more like single people, like making decisions or creating something on their own? Or is there sometimes like you have to coach them on the conversation with someone else?

Temetria: There’s been both actually. And I’m thinking about my last client, one of my latest clients, she was married with a small child and starting a business. And so she did have considerations, you know, childcare and not having the time to really focus because she was caring for a child. So that was different for me, right? I had to think about, help her think about those things that I didn’t have to think about when I was deciding to move and start this business and do all the things. So that was interesting.

Lindsay: Yeah. Did you find it useful or, and I don’t know, you can answer this however you want. But did you find it useful that you sometimes didn’t have maybe some of the story or some of the drama that she did because maybe some of it was like, I wouldn’t even thought of that because I don’t, like because your lives are just different?

Temetria: I did. And I think I brought a couple of things to The Coach Lab too.

Lindsay: As I was asking that, I was like, wait, have we talked about this?

Temetria: Right. Yes, we did. I brought it to The Coach Lab. I did. It was interesting having to help her think about it. Like, I understand you have to take care of your children. And there were a couple of times where I thought maybe it was an excuse.

Lindsay: Yeah, like navigating.

Temetria: Yeah.

Lindsay: That part?

Temetria: Being a single person with no children, I’m like, can I say that? Can I ask her that? And I did gently a couple of times and she admitted that there are probably other options.

Lindsay: I think sometimes it can be really useful to, if you’re a coach or if you are coaching someone on something that you don’t really have any experience with, because it’s an opportunity to be so curious about something because you don’t have any idea about like, here’s how it should go or like, here’s how I did it.

Temetria: Yes.

Lindsay: Yeah. But it can also, I know I’ve coached a lot of people on this, so I know it can also be quite nerve wracking sometimes. Like, am I missing something?

Temetria: Right.

Lindsay: Yeah. Okay.

Temetria: It was good for me. It was good.

Lindsay: Yeah. Good. I love that. And she’s the luckiest because I’m sure you’re an incredible coach.

Is there anything else that you want to add when you think about the Curate Your Life process? Like, have we kind of covered it all? Is there anything we missed?

Temetria: I think we’ve covered it all. I do want to say that the Advanced Certification really helped me. It really did. And to be in the room with other people that were kind of going through the same process, but with different projects and different things, I learned so much. That was such a great container and it really helped me get clear on a lot of things.

Lindsay: I love that. Thank you for sharing. I really enjoy being in containers where everyone’s working on – It’s kind of like the Curate Your Life process, right? Where it’s like, you could do that in a group if you took a bunch of people and said, like, here’s the process we’re going through, but everyone’s working on something different, right? Like, someone’s changing where they live, someone like, whatever. They’re just using the process for different things.

And I think sometimes it can just be so useful because there are similar things that come up, but it really can kind of keep you out of comparing yourself to what everybody else is doing, because ultimately you’re all working on different things. Was that the experience you had?

Temetria: I did. That was.

Lindsay: Yeah. Good. All right. That would have been awkward if you were like, no, it was awful, I was comparing myself all the time.

Temetria: No, it was great. It was a great group.

Lindsay: I love that. Okay, something that I learned about you when we were together that you just kind of mentioned offhand that I was like, whoa, pause one second, we need to know about this, is that you work for – Work for or volunteer with rodeo.

Temetria: Volunteer with.

Lindsay: Okay.

Temetria: The rodeo, yes.

Lindsay: Okay. I just think this is so interesting, mostly because I’m just learning about all the animal life with my daughter and rodeo is clearly not something we have in Indiana, at least not that I know of. So it is a little different, but I’m just so intrigued by that and how you got there. Have you been doing it for a long time? Like anything. Tell me all the things.

Temetria: Okay. So I know, first of all, because I’m a people person, I don’t have pets. I’m really a people person, but I grew up going to the rodeo in San Antonio because it was around my birthday. And when I moved to Austin, they had a rodeo and I would go from time to time, but I had friends who volunteered. And I didn’t know that the rodeos have small staffs, but then they’re really put on by volunteers.

So I asked if I could come along. My first year I was unofficial. And then the second year I signed up, I’ve been a volunteer since 2007. That was my unofficial year. I’m on the board now. I’ve chaired a couple of the committees. I know it’s kind of crazy. People are like – Well, I always say, “Oh, I have rodeo in March.”

Lindsay: Right. I think that’s exactly what you said to me and I was like, pause. What does that mean? You have rodeo as in, you know, I’m like, you’re in it? You’re working it? You’re what? Tell me all the things.

Temetria: Not in it, but working it and involved. And it really kind of takes up the whole month because we have different activities and we’re really getting ready to kick off. And I actually have a meeting tonight. But I love it. I love it so much. It’s fun. It’s a great group of people. It’s for a great cause, we raise money for scholarships for kids.

Lindsay: Yeah, that’s the part that blew my mind. I’m like, I never would have even, I mean, again, I know nothing about the rodeo besides what I see on TV, right? On like Yellowstone or we just watched Twisters. I don’t know if you’ve seen that, but there’s like a rodeo in that. And yeah, I never would see that and think – First, is that what it’s like? Is that like real life?

Temetria: Oh yeah. That is exactly it. Yeah.

Lindsay: Okay. But I would never watch that and think like, oh, obviously there’s like charity happening here. Like there’s something happening besides just the rodeo.

Temetria: Right. Yeah, so we give money for scholarships, and then the kids who raise animals, the FHA kids, they raise their animals and they’re raising money for their education.

Lindsay: Love that. Okay. All right, I do know a little about FHA. We do have that and some of my daughter’s friends are super involved, so that’s fun.

Temetria: Yeah. I think it’s great. They learn so much responsibility. I did not do that. Again, people person. So I didn’t do that when I was growing up. They have to be so responsible and they learn so much.

Lindsay: Yeah. Oh, I think that I’m the same as you, people person. And I have a dog, hypoallergenic, like she acts like a person. So I don’t even know that she counts because I’m allergic to every single thing that ever has existed.

But my daughter who rides horses, she doesn’t just like go to a lesson and ride horses. If it was up to her, she would be at the barn every day, as long as I will take her there. And she just turns into a different person. Like she has a kind of intense, amazing, but very intense energy to her sometimes. When she wants something, she is going to make it happen. And this gives her something to channel that energy into.

But when we’re there, she’s so serious. And she’s not a super serious kid otherwise. But she will say like, you know, not as much now because I know what I’m doing, but it used to be like, you don’t even have your barn shoes on. You can’t come in here in those sandals. You know, just like looking at me like, don’t you even know the rules?

And then watching her lead these animals that are so big and so powerful around with authority is pretty incredible. So although I’m not the biggest animal person, I can really enjoy watching her do that.

Temetria: Yeah, that’s great.

Lindsay: Yeah. Are there kids involved in the actual rodeo or do they kind of come and just watch or how does that work?

Temetria: So they watch. I think there is a junior rodeo. I mean, they got to start somewhere, I guess, right? But yeah, they have the stock shows with the animals, but there is a junior rodeo somewhere.

Lindsay: They’re practicing learning all these things.

Temetria: Okay, but can we do, we can talk about one thing.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Temetria: Do you know what that is? So there are kids –

Lindsay: Say it again.

Temetria: Mutton busting.

Lindsay: Nope, don’t know.

Temetria: They put little kids on sheep. You need to, I’ll send you a video.

Lindsay: Oh my gosh. Okay.

Temetria: It’s the cutest thing. And one of my bosses, he was from Jersey, and he got here and he’s like, what are y’all doing to your children?

Lindsay: Does this happen where you are?

Temetria: This happens at the rodeo every night, yes. I’ll send you a YouTube link, it’s great. So that’s where they start.

Lindsay: Okay, we’ll put it in the show notes in case anyone is super curious about what we’re talking about, because I have no idea. Unless it’s like, there’s no animal cruelty happening, right? People are going to get mad at me. I’m going to be canceled.

Temetria: I don’t think. The sheep are fine.

Lindsay: Okay.

Temetria: They’re like, what is this 30 pounds on my back? And the kids are hanging on for dear life.

Lindsay: Oh my gosh. Okay. Yeah, I need to see this for sure.

All right, so this, it’s so funny that you started that. I mean we just went down a rabbit hole, but it had to be done because we had to talk about rodeo. Guaranteed that will never come up on this podcast again. So that’s like a once in a lifetime opportunity. I had to take it.

But what I love about that is that, that also falls in line with your process, right, and like curating the life that you want and finding this thing that you love that is – And I know you did it before you had the process and had coaching, but when you think about that now, is it a piece of like, yeah, like is it an intentional choice? Like, yes, this is something I love and I’m keeping it.

Temetria: It is an intentional choice because obviously I’m not really involved with the animal side, although I did check in heifers last year. But I do more kind of the backend and different committees that really, if I didn’t actually go to the rodeo, I could probably not see animals. So I curated that piece of it.

Lindsay: Yeah, I love that.

All right. Well, thank you for being here. So one question I told you I was going to ask, which I love to ask people, and it kind of already came up a little bit, so maybe it’s your answer but maybe you have something to add. Is there anything that you coach on, so when you think about your Curate Your Life process, is there anything in your life currently that you are doing that work on that you’re currently working through?

Temetria: I would say all of my life. So the relationships, right? That’s part of it. The business, I’m still bringing in things, that one I would consider education, like bringing in things that I need to build the business, taking away the busy work. So I use it there, I use it in my personal life. So really kind of all of my life, figuring out next steps. You know, am I going to stay in Austin? Am I going to go to San Antonio and be closer to my mom? Probably stay in Austin, this is pretty close. But figuring out the next steps.

Lindsay: Yeah, that’s what I think, one thing I really love about that process is that you can literally just use it over and over and over, or it can be just like one big project, right? If you think about your moving and how you’re kind of like in the middle of it now and there’s a different end goal, and you can take it and apply it to any area of your life. So yeah, that makes a lot of sense to me.

All right, if people love this and they want to find you, tell them everything. Where can they find you? Do you have anything coming up? What do they need to know? And we’ll link it all in the show notes, so you don’t have to spell anything.

Temetria: Okay. So they can find me on Instagram, I’m @CoachTemetria, very creative. That’s also my website. And I am doing this program right now called Simply Curate It, and I think it’ll still be going on. And it’s a series of self-paced webinars that they can view and kind of take different areas of their life. There’s time management, there’s health, there’s wardrobe, I’m forgetting one. Anyway, there are different areas that they can work on.

Lindsay: Yeah, perfect for the end of the year, going into a new year, everybody’s thinking about goals and whatever. Whatever people do at the beginning of years where they set new goals and start thinking about things. So I love it. So good.

Temetria: Thank you.

Lindsay: All right. Well, thank you again for being here today and I will see you again soon.

Temetria: Thank you.`

Thanks for listening to this episode of Mastering Coaching Skills. If you want to learn more about my work, come visit me at lindsaydotzlafcoaching.com. That’s Lindsay with an A, D-O-T-Z-L-A-F.com. See you next week.